SHAME & GUILT
Shame and Guilt block our path to growth more than any other emotions. Each and every one of us have done things we are not proud of, and self forgiveness is the most difficult to give. When we hesitate to forgive others we fear that in the forgiveness we will open ourselves up to being hurt again by that same individual. The same is true for “self forgiveness”! If we give up our guilt, we are afraid we’ll make the same mistake again. Our guilt binds us down and keeps us from repeating the same mistakes over and over again. We even bind ourselves with shame from beliefs we had decades ago, the church ideals we were raised with, or the unforgiving pressure that was imposed upon our childhoods, that we no longer embrace in our lives today. The judgement we held for ourselves then, is the same judgement we carry today. We need to free ourselves from the hold of Shame and continue on our journey of growth Forgive ourselves as we forgive others.
When you trust God you can trust yourself
When you trust yourself you can trust God
One of the most powerful benefits of hypnotherapy is opening your heart and mind up to forgiveness. Forgiving others who have hurt you in the past. Forgiving situations that did not produce desired results. Most of all, forgiving yourself.
The guilt and shame, from past transgressions, we carry with us every day, all but block our ability to connect with our innate knowing. Through forgiving yourself, as graciously as you forgive others, you can clear the space to your Higher Self.
As a child did you ever intuitively know someone was bad or evil and the people you trusted the most in the world, your parents, forced you to spend time with them anyway? Or perhaps your gut told you not to enter a situation and you were shamed into it by people you respected? Or have you ever had a premonition of fear and begrudgingly found yourself in a bad position to keep your job? We are aware of times The Universe spoke to us and we ignored it or dismissed the validity of listening to our inner selves. When we think about these times it is easy to feel shame or anger at those around us. To reopen that channel with The Universe you’ll need to have compassion for yourself and others. Aware that you were doing the best you could with the knowledge you had at the time.
Those of us on a Spiritual Journey find forgiving others fairly straightforward however, the real work is in forgiving ourselves. Many of us were raised in religions where things were very black and white. As children and teenagers we took comfort in the clear definitions of right and wrong. As adults we learn to understand that life is comprised of many shades of gray.
There are so many weaknesses we are willing to excuse in others for but we refuse to allow in ourselves. We hold ourselves to a much higher standard, which you should, but grant yourself some wiggle room.
If your best friend forgives you for your transgressions do you not believe that God would forgive you as well. Do you think that your best friend is wiser? More compassionate? More loving than God? The reverse is also true if your best friend came to you for forgiveness and you granted it willingly are you more loving or more perfect than God?
Many of our generation have been raised in religions that paint God as unforgiving and vengeful. Some have even been taught that they can offend God. Know this: Any being that is all perfect love would never spend a moment of energy being offended. The depth of forgiveness that is granted on this earth will be granted a hundred fold by God.
I have seen clients who have experienced terrible, terrible abuse that carry disgust for their abusers as well as themselves. The burden of anger at the abuser and in those they trusted who did not stop or prevent the abuse, can be paralyzing. Too many times victims hold to hatred towards themselves for not fighting back, even when they were as young as three years old.
Too many times we are afraid to forgive. Worrying that forgiveness is weak when we know, deep down, it is an action of strength. When you absolve others you do not have to forgive the action that was inflicted upon you. Just forgive the person for doing the best they could with the tools they had at the time. Forgiveness does not open up the door for a repeat performance, you have learned your lesson, but you free are able to absolve yourself of the pain, anger, and disappointment.
Through Hypnotherapy the subconscious reveals events that have created fears and anxieties in our adult lives even if there is no memory of the action. The feelings and beliefs that we experience daily can have little to do with our daily lives and more to do with our past. The innocent inner child within us can transfer the pain for 20, 40, even 60 years and import it into our subconscious behaviors. Even though you may have forgotten or blocked the transgression it still has power over you.
Self-forgiveness is a huge key to opening up your intuition and trusting your own inner guidance. When you trust God you can trust yourself. when you trust yourself you can trust God.